Finder's Keeper's

Little Matthew, McKayla and I were having dinner one night last week at Salis Pizza near our house. The owner knew my Matthew from the time he was a kid and I wanted to show off Matthew's beautiful kids.

As we were leaving, McKayla found a cheap little dolly hat in front of the restaurant. I didn't think a thing about it when she asked me if she could have it. I didn't think anyone would come looking for it. We put it in my purse.

When we got home, she asked me to get it out of my purse. Little Matthew immediately says, "Ummmmmmmm...you shouldn't take things Ninaw." I told him that it was on the ground and I didn't know who it belonged to. "Somebody, I don't know who, lost it and I'm sure they won't be looking for it." He insisted that it was wrong that I allowed McKayla to take that dolly hat. I said, "Matthew, I guess you are right. Ninaw just thought since we found it on the floor and nobody was around it was ok. I didn't think about someone coming back to get it." He gives me this look like he was so very disappointed in me and McKayla. Then he tells me, "Ninaw, the Bible says taking things is wrong. The Bible does not say FINDER's KEEPER's, LOSER's WEEPER's!!!!"

Yep, he's just 4 years old!! I told him he was right and that I would take it to the restaurant and leave it there in the lost and found, if they had one. I haven't taken it back yet, but I am going to this week. :)

I have been feeling really guilty ever since that day last week. I've been thinking a lot about how my little granson felt the need to tell me what the Bible says about what I did. He is something else!!!

And, he's 100% right! It doesn't matter that I thought the dolly hat was cheap and of no real value. It wasn't ours to take. It could have been some little girl's only dolly hat. Her mommy and daddy or grandma and grandpa may have come back for it that night, only to be told that nobody had turned in a dolly hat.

*sigh* I should be ashamed of myself. I'm taking that dolly hat to Salis first thing tomorrow!

Two years now

Saturday, June 19, 2010 marked the two year anniversary of our precious son's murder. During the past two years, I have often wondered if the pain would really get any better. Everyone assures me that it does get better. Well, it hasn't yet, and I don't believe it ever will until Demarius Cummings gets his just punishment!!

The hole in my heart scabbed over a bit during the first year. The punishment of James Broadnax in August of 2009 helped. But, for the past two years, everytime I think about Demarius Cummings, the other killer, not being tried for killing my son and Steve, someone might as well be scratching that scab right off of my wounded heart.

For me, healing the incredibly painful wound in my heart can not possibly begin until justice is served for Demarius Cummings. Cummings has to be tried and punished for his part in the evil, senseless and heartless acts of violence that night. Broadnax and Cummings took a huge piece of my heart on June 19, 2008.

My amazing son, Matthew, who was so very passionate about life, loving God and loving and helping others, ceased to exist on this earth that night. My sweet, precious little guy, whom I gave birth to and cared for all of his life, took his last breath about 1am while bleeding to death on the hard concrete parking lot in front of his recording studio...the studio he dreamed about for most of his adult life. The dreams he had...shattered. His sweet wife and their two little babies...vanished from his eyes. The family that he loved so much...separated from. Because TWO, not ONE, scum of the earth, low-life thieves decided that killing two wonderful men, men of God, men who cared enough to even stop and talk to them, was their only solution to obtaining a "ride" back to their rat hole apartment in the Junction in East Dallas.

As Cummings said during his jailhouse interview, "...I didn't know he was gonna' shoot 'em; You nahemsane....well, I take that back...I tole him he might has to pop 'em a few times...". It was THEIR grand plan to steal Steve's car by asking Steve for a cigarette to distract him. They BOTH planned to shoot Steve and Matthew a few times, at close range, so they could get the car keys and steal their wallets. Broadnax just took it a little farther when he continued shooting them so that he could, as he said during his jailhouse interview, "....make sure dey was dead.." But, Cummings PLANNED to rob and shoot both Matthew and Steve. Cummings is just as guilty. You may be asking why Cummings is still sitting in our Dallas County Jail, two years after the murders, having visitors, watching TV, enjoying his commissary items, playing basketball, getting phone calls, etc! Good question!!


Maybe Craig Watkins could answer that question since he's the one that told us the DAs office didn't have the money to take this murdering thief to trial. Maybe he could give us a good answer...that is, IF we could get him, or anyone else in the Dallas County DAs office to return our phone calls or our email.

I'm waiting patiently for my wounded heart to heal a bit more. Broadnax, although he is on death row, still exists...for now. But, at least I know he will never get out of jail to hurt anyone else. I feel a peace about that. Cummings will most likely NOT ever be given the death penalty if/when he does face trial. But, that's for a jury to decide. We should have the right to insist on a jury trial for Cummings. It is very disturbing to me that he has yet to be tried and punished. It's been TWO YEARS NOW!!! Could he possibly be one of the violent offenders that Mr. Watkins chooses to grant early release to one day in the future? Maybe...it could happen!! Craig Watkins has no problem granting early release to violent criminals to reduce overcrowding in our jails. And, that scares me.

By the way, Cummings is not the gentle, innocent boy that he portrayed himself to be during his jailhouse interview. He had been in trouble before; been violent before. Remember, it was his idea to, "...take the train to Garland to rob some rich, white folks...." that night. He planned for his cousin to do his dirty work though so he could say, "...I want folks to know I didn't kill anyone..."

Well, TO HELL WITH YOU, DEMARIUS CUMMINGS!!! I am 100% sure that Matthew and Steve would be alive today had you not made your suggestion to your idiot cousin (as you walked away from Matthew and Steve that night), "....it's a long damn walk home to the Junction...this could be our chance to get us a ride....you might has to pop 'em a few times...." I SAY, TO HELL WITH YOU, CUMMINGS!!! Okay, if not hell, then you need to be given life in prison without the possibility of parole....EVER!!!!

I ask you, when will Demarius Cummings get his punishment, Mr. Watkins? I would like to finally be able to know what it feels like to "GET BETTER".